alt_sally_anne: (This conversation is making me nervous)
Sally-Anne Perks ([personal profile] alt_sally_anne) wrote2013-06-09 11:16 am

I Solemnly Swear That I Am Up To No Good: Private message to Pansy

Terry wanted to warn me about some of the things the Order said about Mr Malfoy. About what he did in Ireland, especially. He wasn't sure how you'd react.

You and Harry and Draco were talking the other day about trying to get on the Council. Are you still thinking about it? Even after
alt_pansy: (looking sideways)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 04:33 pm (UTC)(link)
I don't know.

I don't want Draco and Harry to be alone.

They've already mentioned me as a possibility, and if Justin doesn't want to go down that road, I feel like I ought to at least try.

I want

I want to be of some use. I'm not going to be a Healer, or be able to help with maps and ley lines and things, what I've got is my name and connections, so I might as well put them to work.
alt_pansy: (newme)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 04:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Maybe they needed her to secure Hogwarts.

Maybe she does really awful things, which is why she drank.

And what else could I do? Throw the right kind of parties and hope something useful comes of it? Marry a council member, and use him for information? If I have to be like Lana Sandoval to be of use, maybe I ought to work on being more like Lana Sandoval.
alt_pansy: (confidentially)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 05:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Okay.

I guess I'm still feeling sort of useless after our careers meetings, and everyone else seems to be so sure of what they can do.

I'm sorry. I'm whinging.

And I don't want Draco and Harry to try and take on the Council from within alone, if it comes to that. And if there's only a few of us who could help them that way, I guess I just thought that'd be something, you know?
alt_pansy: (newme)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 05:39 pm (UTC)(link)
You're right. It's not the only way. And I'm not even sure if I could.

I guess it's mostly that if I did have a chance at it, then yes, there'd be other things I could do to be helpful, but I'd be short-sighted to walk away from the possibility entirely because I didn't want to get my hands dirty.
alt_pansy: (confidentially)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 05:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you for that.
alt_pansy: (dark and scared)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 04:37 pm (UTC)(link)
And Lucius

I know

I mean, I know he's done awful things.

It isn't like I thought the entire time that he'd never killed anyone before.
alt_pansy: (depressed)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 04:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Still. Almost five thousand people. In two days.

It's

I can't even hold that number in my head.
alt_pansy: (looking sideways)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 04:58 pm (UTC)(link)
And Lucius was punished, too. Bill Weasley said he had been. Badly enough for Percy to say something, which means it was pretty bad.

So maybe he was part of Mr Selwyn's plan too. Or enough of a part of it to get in trouble, but not enough to be killed.
alt_pansy: (uncertain)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 05:33 pm (UTC)(link)
I'd know. At least I think I'd know.

Mr Selwyn got closer to killing him than anyone has in years and years.

If my cutting out person's heart could give us the chance to save millions

I know. It'd have to be more than just doing something awful to one person.
alt_pansy: (looking thinking)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 05:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Draco saw it. He'd know. I just don't know if he'd tell me.
alt_pansy: (uncertain)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 05:59 pm (UTC)(link)
I suppose I can't avoid it forever. And he can always choose not to answer.

I'll ask. And if he doesn't want to tell me, I can see for myself.
alt_pansy: (confidentially)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 06:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Okay.
alt_pansy: (uncertain)

[personal profile] alt_pansy 2013-06-09 05:01 pm (UTC)(link)
I still

I hate what he's done.

But I don't hate him. I can't.