I Solemnly Swear That I Am Up To No Good

[alt_sally_anne]

Alright Ron.

I've been very patient since you got back. Pansy told me a few things (Carrow saying something about the Forbidden Forest, and spiders, giant spiders, and a muggle car) but it was hard to speak privately stuck in our house and anyway, I want your version too.

WHAT HAPPENED? Why did you go running off into the Forbidden Forest because of something CARROW said?

Comments

[alt_ron]

Yeah. We were there in Carrow's office, y'know. Well, we'd just got the door open and it set off an alarm, right? So we figured we were dead. But then all of a sudden MarHarry's head popped out from undwhere they were hiding 'cause it turns out he and Malfoy were there, too. So they budged up and let us hide with them.

And just in time, too, because Carrow came crashing in right then. I was just barely out of sight. And actually, come to think of it, he probably saw me.

But he didn't have time to do anything about it, 'cause right behind him was Mr Malfoy and Minister Fudge and some really scary blokes that Harry reckons were Hit Wizards or Enforcers at MLE or something. And they arrested him right there in front of us, and he was furious and said Malfoy and Fudge didn't have the right kind of loyalty or weren't really doing His business, meddling in the great mysteries of I dunno, he wanted to say a load of stuff, but they cut him off. And then right before they were going to take him out, he turned around halfway and said something about his rats and then said 'If anyone wanted to figure out what's really happening here, they'd follow the spiders.' It was a bit like he meant they were pulling the wrong end of the stick, arresting him. Like it wasn't him at all but someone using the spiders to do bad stuff. And, y'know, once they'd all gone and we could come out. We all just looked at each other and thought, well yeah. The spiders. Every time somebody's got attacked, the spiders have acted completely queer and then they all leave. Like they were sent here out of the Forest and then they go back.

So, yeah. Then we slipped out and went out there.

[alt_sally_anne]

GIANT SPIDERS.

There are GIANT SPIDERS in the Forbidden Forest.

I still want to go there but I'm definitely taking a Gryffindor with me, preferably one I don't much like who runs more slowly than I do (Finnigan would do, I reckon I could outrun him if I really wanted).

[alt_ron]

Yes, there were spiders. Didn't Pansy tell you that part? They were horrible. Big as houses, y'know, but with bloody great tree trunks for legs. And hairy.

with pincers

and eyes

[alt_neville]

Blimey. Hope you won't have nightmares tonight. The last time you had 'em, it was about spiders, wasn't it? I know you hate them.

[alt_ron]

Thanks, mate.

Yeah.

Not that I have nightmares a lot, y'know. Only, when I do, it's pretty much always spiders.

[alt_ron]

Well. You could take Lavender.

She could shout limericks at them and pelt them with ink pots while you run away.

[alt_sally_anne]

For that I'd need Lav-possessed-by-Peeves and I don't think she'll make that mistake again.

[alt_ron]

You don't know: she might do. She's not really all that clever.

[alt_sally_anne]

No, you're right. She rather thoroughly lives up to what they say about Gryffindors, actually.

[alt_sally_anne]

Which of course is TOTALLY UNFAIR to you and Neville; no one would ever, ever say that either of you have more guts than sense.

I mean, unless they were thinking about you running off into the Forbidden Forest because Carrow suggested it! (And yes yes yes it was ALL Harry's idea not yours but of course, he was originally sorted into Gryffindor and I'd say this sort of thing shows why!)

[alt_ron]

You know, I really shouldn't tell you any more about what happened.

Since you OBVIOUSLY don't approve and don't find it exciting AT ALL, and don't wish you could have DONE IT YOURSELF.

Slytherins.

[alt_sally_anne]

Well maybe you can just count me out the next time you need someone to DISTRACT THE PREFECTS for you, Mr Brave Excitement-Seeking Forest-Exploring Almost-Spider-Dinner Gryffindor.

[alt_ron]

Heh.

[alt_neville]

She had pretty good aim with 'em, didn't she? The ink pots, anyway.

[alt_ron]

Yeah. You can say that again.

[alt_sally_anne]

Did you spend the whole day talking to the spiders? You were gone a LONG time.

[alt_ron]

Well, yeah. It took a long time to get out there. I mean, we were following this whole herd of

of spiders all through the forest. And they didn't exactly care about following the paths, y'know, cause they can just scurry up a tree trunk to get round something in the way or just hurtle under or over stuff. Merlin, there were thousands of them. I mean, you couldn't see where the line started or ended and they just kept coming and it was just thick with them, y'know. All rushing over each other and

and us

 
 

[alt_ron]

I can't believe you're making me tell you this. It was horrible. I couldn't sleep last night because I kept feeling them on me. Uggggghhhhhhh.

Anywiz, yeah, so it took a long time to get to where they were all going. And then, um.

Okay. Harry said not to tell some of this stuff, so you've got to tell me if you want to know it if it means keeping it secret from him and Malfoy and Pansy that I told you.

And the rest of you lot had better not tell either, but it's Sally Anne's call cause she has to see them all the time and not let on some of this stuff.

So. Do you want me to tell you the whole thing?

[alt_sally_anne]

Well

How secret is it?

I mean is it a secret because it's embarrassing to Pansy? Because if that's what it is, don't tell me.

[alt_ron]

No. Y'know, Pansy was really brave about the whole thing. I mean, Malfoy was completely wet about even going out there. Like he thought the forest might hurt him just taking the first step in. Oh, he tried pretending that he thought it was just a daft idea to go in there, but you could totally see he was scared squib about it. His hands were shaking, and he kept looking around behind him all the tme, like something was about to attack him. And there almost was--Pansy and me, because we were behind him and he kept stopping all of a sudden so we kept running into him. It was ridiculous, really.

But, um, okay. I was totally as scared as he was when the big spiders started crawling out of holes and dropping down out of their gigantic webs in the trees and--

So, no. It's nothing bad about Pansy at all.

The thing is, it wasn't just spiders we met out there.

[alt_ron]

And it wasn't just because of the car that we got away, though that helped a lot because at the end, they were going to eat us anyway even though he said not to and their king said they shouldn't. A bunch of them said, 'it's not everyday we get to eat wizards,' and they would've, too, except for the Ford roaring in just then.

But the really big thing, heh, yeah, Big. There was this giant out there, living with the spiders. Or anywiz, he was there, talking with them. He said his name but I didn't really catch it and, anyway, he had a kind of, well, common accent and so it was hard to tell what he was saying some of the time. But his name was something like Harkrim or Harmrid or I dunno. Something like that.

Anywiz, he knew we were from Hogwarts. Said he used to be a student here and then he worked here, too. Until the war and all. And he knew the Headmistress. And when he found out who Harry was, he knew all about him. Except he knew his other name, and knew all about his parents and how they died. And he told Harry how he'd gone that night his parents got killed and tried to save Harry, but the Protector had taken him. Except he called Him 'You Know Who', and none them knew what he meant except for me because sometimes my parents call him that, the Protector. And so I had to tell them it was something people called him before he was Protector--people who were afraid of him, I guess. Oh. And then he figured out who I was, cause I'm ginger, I guess. Anywiz, he knew my parents and he said they're the nicest people in the whole-- said he liked them. And he said it made perfect sense that we'd be friends, Harry and me, because our parents knew each other and were all friends with the same people. But then he guessed who Malfoy was, too, and you should've heard what he had to say about Mr Malfoy! It would've been hilarious, except it made Harry cross, and he started asking why he should believe anything this giant said.

And so then he calmed down, Harkerd did, and he told Harry some stuff about his parents and what good people they were, and how they fought against You Know Who and wanted the Ministry to be fair to everyone, not just give everything to purebloods. And he said he was friends with Sirius Black, and that it was Black's motorcycle that he flew the night he tried to save Harry. And then he started crying about how he found their house all ruined and his parents, y'know, and Harry was gone cause he'd been taken away by You Know Who. And he'd had to go back and tell Dumbledore--oh, yeah. D'you know about Albus Dumbledore? My parents used to talk about him some, too. I guess he was a really important wizard and also the Headmaster here. Anywiz, he said it was Dumbledore who wanted to save Harry and that he'd meant to have Sirius Black raise him because he's Harry's godfather.

And I think he wanted Harry to see that he's not the Protector's son, and he was pretty surprised Harry already knew that and was still living with him and all. And he was trying to tell Harry some of the really terrible stuff the Protector's done, but Malfoy told him he'd better stop saying that stuff and Harry told him to stop, too, even though he'd really wanted to hear what Harkrim could tell him about his parents and their friends and all.

I dunno. There might've been more than that, but I can't remember all of it. He was a talker, that giant bloke.

[alt_sally_anne]

There was a giant who was a student here? and then worked here? and was friends with Harry's real parents and your parents?

Was he REALLY a giant or just really tall? I thought giants were supposed to be pretty stupid, like trolls but bigger.

Why didn't the spiders eat him?

Dumbledore I've heard of. I looked up the old annuals last year to see pictures of my parents, and of course he was headmaster back then and his picture was in the annuals. Did you know he used to be on Chocolate Frog cards?

[alt_ron]

Yeah, I dunno. He was big. Like three times bigger than me? or maybe four times. But he was normal, y'know, brain-wise. A little excitable, but normal.

And the king spider or whatever. He was the giant bloke's friend. Said they went way back to when he was a student. And, oh! That was something else. So when we asked why Professor Carrow would've said to follow the spiders, they had no idea. The giant knew about Carrow and said he was a Death Eater, said he was the worst of the worst. And Harry asked him if he knew anything about the Chamber of Secrets, and he just sort of stopped and his mouth dropped open. He didn't want to really say much about that, I guess. Except when we said it was happening again and we thought it was Carrow doing it, he said that couldn't be right because he wasn't even at school when it happened. The first time, he meant. And Harry asked him if he meant he had been. The giant, I mean. And he said, yeah. He had. And Carrow didn't start school till later. So we were talking about it, and I guess Carrow could just have got the idea from that first time if he'd heard about it, and he could just have been copying it to throw everybody off suspecting him.

[alt_sally_anne]

Well, if you want to look him up, you'll have to do it -- if I looked him up Pansy would want to know why.

I don't see why Carrow would have to have been around the first time. But if you looked up the annuals you could maybe look through the students and see who else was there, you know, at the same time.

[alt_ron]

And, oh. About the frog cards. Yeah, I've seen Dumbledore's card. My brother Charlie's got a full set from back when he was little. And I think someone gave him the Dumbledore card, but anywiz, he's got it. He reckons it might be valuable someday, but I think it makes Mum nervous he's got it just in case anyone ever finds out he does, y'know. They might think he was in league with Sirius Black or something.

[alt_sally_anne]

Also, if you wanted to work out the giant's name you could look in the annuals. I expect his picture would be easy to spot. You might have to look in a lot of them, though, unless you know when it was he went to school.

[alt_sally_anne]

Also, here's something else I'd like to know:

Of you, Pansy, Draco, and Harry, who was saying 'yeah! let's go into the forest and see about spiders!' and who was saying 'are you mad, it's forbidden for a reason; let's go back to our common rooms and tell our mates Carrow's been arrested!'

I mean Draco's saying it was all because YOU wanted to go into the forest and Harry's saying it was all because HE wanted to go into the forest and Pansy's actually been rather cagey about that bit, but we've barely been out of sight of a prefect all day and it's hard when you know you might be overheard.

[alt_ron]

Yeah, well. I wasn't too keen on the part where it was spiders we were following, but I totally thought we ought to go see what he was on about. And it made sense that all those spiders had something to do with it. I mean, every time there's been somebody attacked, there they go again, don't they?

And Pansy agreed. Because we all agreed that there was something Carrow'd been hiding. And if it had to do with the spiders, then we should find out about it. And when else were we going to get to go. That was Pansy's point. That we should go right then, while everyone was someplace else and we could just go cause no one would see us.

But I actually don't know whether we'd have gone, if it'd been just Pansy and me. Cause, for one thing, we knew you'd want to kill us if we did. And we'd have wanted to do it when you could come. But it was also that Harry had hishas got really good at duelling and his wand works where, y'know. Pansy said she felt better going in there with somebody else who could use their wand and know what it would do. So, yeah. So, we probably wouldn't have if it hadn't been for how much Mar Harry wanted to.

The only thing Malfoy told the truth about is how hard he tried to talk Harry out of going.