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alt_sally_anneSo have they been pulling all of us aside for quiet little conversations or just me? Because first Mrs Longbottom wanted to talk to me and then yesterday it was Tonks.
Mrs Longbottom wanted to tell me that they're trying to be less secretive and it's hard because they've got so many bad habits to break. Only I guess she could tell how cross I was getting because she backed off after a bit.
Talking to Tonks was betteralthough I'm even more confused now about -- she had an awful, awful foster family, you know, Auror Crouch's parents. Once when she was sick, they didn't want to get her a Healer but they didn't want to catch the disease from her so they shut her in her room and barely even fed her.
She wanted to know if I wanted to join the Order. And what I thought was worth taking risks for, which was a good question, actually, it was sort of what Michael and I had that last really big fight over. He thought I was taking too many risks, with the potions.
And maybe he's right? Healing the muggle children who were sick last year, that was worth a lot of risk. Because some of them would have died. (And it turns out that none of them did, after all.) But the Hogwarts students who are hexed to throw up or have headaches or to drop things constantly or all the other awful things that Umbridge does to people, they won't die, or at least they shouldn't. It's about hurting people. And I can't -- I don't know, I can't bring myself to look at people who I could help and say, 'you're not hurting ENOUGH for me to risk myself.'
I don't know.
It's easier to make a decision when you know the consequences will be be annoying but not horrible, like if I'm taking a risk of being punished in an ordinary way it's different than if I'm risking being sent to the camps. And it's easier to make a decision when you know that what you're trying to stop is really truly awful, like if I'm taking a risk to protect someone from being sent to the camps it's different than if I'm taking a risk to stop them vomming up their supper.
Mrs Longbottom wanted to tell me that they're trying to be less secretive and it's hard because they've got so many bad habits to break. Only I guess she could tell how cross I was getting because she backed off after a bit.
Talking to Tonks was better
She wanted to know if I wanted to join the Order. And what I thought was worth taking risks for, which was a good question, actually, it was sort of what Michael and I had that last really big fight over. He thought I was taking too many risks, with the potions.
And maybe he's right? Healing the muggle children who were sick last year, that was worth a lot of risk. Because some of them would have died. (And it turns out that none of them did, after all.) But the Hogwarts students who are hexed to throw up or have headaches or to drop things constantly or all the other awful things that Umbridge does to people, they won't die, or at least they shouldn't. It's about hurting people. And I can't -- I don't know, I can't bring myself to look at people who I could help and say, 'you're not hurting ENOUGH for me to risk myself.'
I don't know.
It's easier to make a decision when you know the consequences will be be annoying but not horrible, like if I'm taking a risk of being punished in an ordinary way it's different than if I'm risking being sent to the camps. And it's easier to make a decision when you know that what you're trying to stop is really truly awful, like if I'm taking a risk to protect someone from being sent to the camps it's different than if I'm taking a risk to stop them vomming up their supper.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-04-12 08:36 pm (UTC)Which is one of the reasons why you're you.
There aren't many of them. At all. I mean, from what we can tell. They might have loads and loads of members they keep even more quiet about, but really, I think we met most of them this week, and they mentioned like a few more who weren't there, but I'm pretty sure you could take everyone who's a part of it and sit them around the kitchen table at Grimmauld.
It'd be hard for a group that size to do everything right all the time and help everyone. Even if they really wanted to. I mean, we aren't perfect either.
But at least they're trying? Which is something?
(no subject)
Date: 2013-04-12 08:50 pm (UTC)I think you're right there aren't very many. Which is a pretty discouraging thing to think too much about. Though there are those babies they're raising, kind of their own tiny secret wizarding army but it's going to take SO LONG.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-04-12 09:11 pm (UTC)Mrs Longbottom gave me this button, it's a little like the galleons but it can be used by muggles. She wants me to give it to someone at the Stretton estates, someone who's trusted and maybe a little bit of a leader.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-04-12 09:20 pm (UTC)That's interesting. I thought they were really serious about muggle born, but I didn't think they were as involved with muggles.
I wonder how many they've passed out. And what they say to each other.